Female orgasm has long been a source of mystery, curiosity and sometimes frustration for both sexes. Although most women know if they are experiencing orgasm, doubts are also common. The best way to know for sure is to practice having orgasms by yourself before you try with your partner. Initial tentativeness is perfectly normal and will pass if you approach this as a wonderful journey of self-exploration and self-awareness. Many women of all ages who never thought this was possible take the plunge and are delighted with the results. The change in self-esteem is often remarkable.
Great resources exist for gently guiding you through this process. My favorite book is Becoming Orgasmic, by Julie Heiman, Director of the Kinsey Institute, and Joseph Lo Piccolo. Another sex-positive book with a bit more “edge” is Betty Dodson’s Sex for One. You can use either of these on your own, or if you choose, seek the assistance of a fully credentialed certified sex therapist to support you along the way. Check out www.aasect.org, the website of The American Association of Sex Educators Counselors and Therapists, for a qualified licensed professional in your area.
You are in for a great adventure!